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Thursday, June 3, 2021

The Moa

Walt: Tightening tension and sizzling start

Over the last couple of weeks, the class has been working on making sizzling starts and tightening tension. It has been super fun I really enjoyed making my ancient Aotearoa story. I hope you like it  

The Moa

Thump, Thump, Thump! The Moa ran across the plain adrenaline pumped through her ancient but muscular legs. Up ahead the eagle screamed with rage, he wasn’t going to stop until she was dead.


She had to get back to her eggs but first, she needed to be in the cover of the punga ferns. 75mm talons viciously tore at her back. Feathers flew into the air and fell down like raindrops. She Screamed with blind pain, blood oozing through her feathers.


Her large body stumbled through the shade of the punga, her vision was blurred, the gash was deep. She tripped over a thick pohutukawa root, her head smacked back down onto the ice-cold earth. Her eyes slowly focused on the beautiful speckled eggs, reality slowly clicked in, she would never see her eggs hatch. Sadness overwhelmed her as her life slowly faded away...    


Hunter Marsh



2 comments:

  1. Hi there Hunter, my name is Mark a year 8 Student at Paihia School. I really like your blog about “The Moa” because you have added extra detail to your writing. This reminds me of when I was a year 7 and we had to make a T shaped for the Moa.

    Did you know when the Moa went extinct?

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  2. Hi Hunter, my name is Tiana and I am a year seven student from Paihia School. I really like your blog post because you have a lot of punctuation and vocabulary. I also like your post because you have used words to make me want to read your writing. For my writing I have been learning to use a lot of vocabulary in my writing to describe about a scene of a episode.
    Was this activity fun for you?

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